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SO YOU DIDN’T EVEN HAVE PENETRATIVE SEX? – Anonymous 007

When I was about 6, my older male cousin introduced me to the concept of making out with the same gender. That might’ve been when I got my first erection. No penetrative sex. Then, when I was between the ages of 8 & 9 the female house help also took me a bit further. I had my first orgasm with her but we never had penetrative sex.

How long has this sexual abuse / behaviour occurred/been occurring?

About two years cumulatively.

Have you ever told anyone or received help?

Yes and yes.

Who did you tell or what type of help did you receive?

I originally told my parents when I had a mental breakdown later in life. My mother’s response was “So you didn’t even have penetrative sex? Your father had worse, with his Aunty when he was a boy’’. I would, many years later, bring it up with a therapist who let me know that what happened to me wasn’t okay, under any circumstances, and helped me try to move past the invalidation of my experience from my mother. My mother, at the time, also said I should’ve known that what was happening was wrong.

Have you noticed any physical or medical changes with your body as a result of the sexual abuse?

No

What has been the emotional or psychological effects you’ve experienced as a result of the sexual abuse?

Since I was a teenager I struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts. I later learned that the abuse might’ve had something to do with that. Something, but not the whole story.

Do you wish to further speak with mental health professionals about this?

No

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